Tuesday, February 24, 2009

What would you do if you were me?

I don't always voice out what I feel. I rarely show my feelings. But lately, I have been feeling that people have taken advantage of my meekness. It's not my strongest trait. Yet, I noticed that I have been overlooked by my superiors at work. I am a diligent worker, I get things done. I stay after hours if need be. Still, I feel that I haven't gotten what I deserve. People I started with are now at the Director or VP level, and I am left working for people that started after me.

I'm not complaining. With the economic crisis going on, I am fortunate to have a job. Our company laid off workers for the first time in 40 years. Everyone else received a paycut. I am simply wondering why I haven't reached the higher positions that my colleagues have reached. Do I need to become an a**hole to move up? Some of the people who have been promoted (no offense guys) don't even know what they are doing! I, on the other hand have more experience and expertise than they do!

I hate suck ups. That is one thing I detest. If I am going to move up, I want it to be due to my own merits and not because I sucked up to the big boss. Although at times, I think that's the only way! I mean, a person who has screwed up more than accomplish anything was recently promoted to "Director".. come on! Should I take up training? Should I go back to school and take up a "pulling-your-own-strings" course? What am I doing wrong? Arrrrgghh!!! I refuse to believe that a "Once a pee-on is always a pee-on." I still believe strongly that people are rewarded for what they do. But when is it going to happen to me?

Sunday, February 8, 2009

I'm now on the up and up... no more drama

If you've been following my rants on this blog, you may have read that I started dating someone. Well, somewhat dating. We live in two different continents and it's amazing how easy and difficult long distance relationships are. You may have read from my previous post
that we've decided to not continue with the "relationship" until we meet. That was almost a month ago. Did we stop? Nope. We somehow got used to texting and calling each other every day and it was a difficult habit to part with. I miss his hearty laugh and his silliness.

We are looking forward to our meeting in May, and hopefully, the virtual relationship we think is working will work as well when that time comes. We are both hopeful, yet scared of the unknown. As each day passes and we get closer to that day - we fret and we worry. At the same time, we are way too excited to even think about it.

I don't know if you've ever been in an online relationship. I have and it all sounds nice over the phone, YM or SKYPE but I've had encounters where it turns our to be totally different when we meet. This may be different but we can't be sure. He tells me that he's sure and that nothing can change how he feels. I am uncertain that I could count on that promise. I am hoping but unyielding.

I just have to take everything one step at a time. Time is our only friend right now. It will come and soon it will pass. That day when we finally gaze at each other's eyes and know for certain where this relationship will lead us.

For now, we will keep on. Nobody said it was going to be easy. No one could give us a guarantee as well. Let's just throw it up in the air and see where it falls.

Have a great week y'all.


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